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Thursday, December 2

Ek se bhale do !!

Vardan Mathur posted this beautiful piece about adopting a child today.
This is something that has been on my mind recently. In fact there are two issues and I'll talk about both of them.
First issue is the same as discussed in the talk also. On my way to office, I daily pass a crossing where 2 small kids, barely 4-5 years old, brother and sister, perform some gymnastics and then ask for money from the people who have stopped there. Now as a matter of principle, I never give them any money because I believe that first, giving them money will only encourage this thing and the person behind the game will push even more children into begging (most of the times, there is some adult person involved) and second that giving money is the least and as I said above, may be the worst kind of help that u can provide. It provides you with a false sense of having done something without actually doing anything. So untill I do anything worthwhile, I donot want to live under the false pretence of having done something. The question that always bothered me was, what?
The second issue is about the rising trend of single child. Now in my opinion and as I read some of comments on another blog, being a lonely child is not the best thing in the world to happen to a child. What siblings provide, friends do not compensate for in most of the cases. In fact as the families grow smaller, so many relationships that we enjoyed are lost. I have an elder sister and still I worry that my children will have no Chacha ji or Tau ji or my sister's children will have no Mausi. And looking at all the fun and all the love that I get from all my relations, I am sad that our next generation is going to miss that.
And now look again at the article in the beginning of the post. Isn't that a very beautiful solution for both the problems !! and I think it is very balanced. A decision to have no child of their own at all is a tough one and not all the couples can sustain that. And having more children is obviously bad for our country. Moreover it can also solve the problem of those couples who wanted a girl and instead got a boy or vice versa. They can just go and adopt one that makes their family more complete.
Of course there are pitfalls here too. It can prove to be a tricky affair to treat both the children as same and check urself from either being over indulgent or partial to one of them. Moreover, later on in life, there might be problems when the adopted child might want to find out his/her own identity. But as they say, love can overcome everything.
The mere thought of this thing is so beautiful that it fills me with pleasure now even though any of this is still in distant future for me. I think this is going to be the path for me but as Vardan says, 50% decision is yet to be taken :). In any case, I finally see the light at the end of the tunnel and I am sure it will be the day light !!

3 comments:

Bhim said...

Hey. Its good to know that my post had an effect. I hope more and more people move ahead and stop raising eyebrows over this 'issue'.

Like Dilip says, Adoption is just another natural way of having a baby. :)
VM

Braveheart said...

Very nice thought. I have always like it. Though, to me, the inspiration came from one of my friends, Maria, who always insists on adopting a child.

However amazing this thought maybe to me, I always encounter one problem. I want my child to necessarily have an astro background as I want it. I mean at least the things I have my control on. Else, I know I'd be a very bad father. At least, I'd like to be sure about the astro details of the child, which, I dont think I can be in the case of an adopted child.

This one dillemma is what I discussed with Maria too, but I dont see any solution.

Akshaya

Manish said...

Very noble and well expressed desire, but honestly speaking, very diffcult to implement. More over, in a country like India, where law make it very difficult.